and next time when you feel me up, do it right
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
