I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Panties = found
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
