I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
