i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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