I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
