just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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