Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize