he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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