Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize