When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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