return my video game
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
