ADVERTISEMENT

• (207): View more from Maine

  I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?

  Fav 13 2676 1114

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.

  Fav 36 7111 996

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (347): View more from New York

  tell your sister to shave her snatch

  Fav 17 1487 3619

  share tweet
  

• (909): View more from California

  If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?

  Fav 14 1289 4457

  share tweet
  

• (408): View more from California

  Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?

  Fav 4 1856 1332

  share tweet
  

• (314): View more from Missouri

  Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.

  Fav 10 2731 1212

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it

  Fav 3 1337 749

  share tweet
  

• (775): View more from Nevada

  Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.

  Fav 1 559 766

  share tweet
  

• (530): View more from California

  Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.

  Fav 3 639 841

  share tweet
  

• (563): View more from Iowa

  No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.

  Fav 2 854 536

  share tweet
  

• (650): View more from California

  Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?

  Fav 3 268 155

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (804): View more from Virginia

  It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike

  Fav 1 162 107

  share tweet
  

• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.

  Fav 0 67 11

  share tweet
  

• (551): View more from New Jersey

  Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots

  Fav 0 41 11

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (949): View more from California

  You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.

  Fav 0 113 6

  share tweet
  

Randomize