Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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