i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
