Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
