Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
