i just had sex bonerless
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
