I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
