Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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