Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
