You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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