ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
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