Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
