Only a mothe r could love this liver
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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