I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
either way he was missing a nipple.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Randomize
