Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
