it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize
