its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
