Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
