paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
