we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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