just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
