eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
