"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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