Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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