i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
