My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
