i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
organizing the empties. That sober.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
