he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
