I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Bring me that man meat
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
