I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
