I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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