The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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