Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize