Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
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