would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
True strength comes from lack of pants
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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