Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
