just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
