so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
