So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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