So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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